Well, I had to do some science here, guys.
This is the shit I wore the most over the past month. What made it look effortless on the days I wanted to do nothing but put on my old uniform and call it a day.
I’m avoiding regurgitation here, so if you’re thinking, Hey, you wore those other things more, it’s because I already flapped my fingers about them.
adidas Japan Shoes
Unless it’s a boot, I really don’t fuck with bulky footwear. As a society, we need to move on from shoes that make you look like Megatron. These have sat barely touched in the shoe thing by my door for way too long. Something this small is easy to miss.
Lowkey, they’re just ballet flats with laces. I was shocked they made them in a 14. I feel cool wearing them—freaking a dainty shoe on a big man.
My only hang-up is that they’re pants sneakers. Due to poor planning, I once had to do a quick run in them with shorts and felt like Bill Laimbeer auditioning for Swan Lake.
Banana Republic Supima Tee
Just because it’s pretty doesn’t mean it’s sexy. Now, I could tell you about the shirt-on-nip feel, but I’m no perv.
I didn’t foresee this becoming my go-to white tee, and this isn’t part of the “Banana Republic is so back” glazing discourse. It’s just a soft-ass white T-shirt that doesn’t look like shit after you wear it all day. They also make it in a tall size, which helps when it comes time to tuck.
It’s probably too expensive to be my go-to white undershirt, but I am a sick man and my white tees are on constant audit. Isn’t it worth a few extra bucks to make it look like you’ve never put any thought into it?
C.P. Company Cargo Trousers
I don’t have a good reason why Stone Island makes me feel like a baby and C.P. Company makes me feel like a big boy, but these pants are broken.
C.P. is the world leader in pants with too much storage. I have a lighter green pair that I actually like more, but my dry-cleaning lady told me the pocket was too much work to fix.
I’ll show her.
Dark green is just far enough off the beaten path to make muggles think you’re onto something without you really saying anything. They’re wide enough to stand out without making you look like a breeze might take you away.
Yes, I have green pants with elastic in the waist, but who wants to deal with that when you’re trying to LARP sprezzatura for five fit pics a week?
Plus, I’m a known hypocrite.
Our Legacy Every Shirt
Here I go justifying again.
I could tell you I have to shop at Our Legacy because I’m a bigger guy and the Scandi brands make clothes for my build—but that sounds like a load of shit, no?
OL’s an elite playing dress-up brand. I usually don’t buy it full price, but I used this as an excuse to buy a way-too-expensive small-talk tee from Cueva a while back.
This shirt bangs. It feels incredible, the craftsmanship, blah blah blah. My favorite fit from the past month was this shirt with the C.P. cargos. Because I do transparency, it photographs insanely well. It carries the water on days getting flicked would usually be a chore.
Did it hurt going down? Yes, but so do shots. As long as you get better, does it really matter?
Honorable Mention: Uniqlo Brown Barrel Pants
Just buy a pair already.
Mets 59FIFTY
My newest fighter. I just get into a good rhythm with a hat and run it into the ground.
Hats look best when they have a nice stinky patina and look like you’ve had them since the day you were born.
I haven’t enjoyed a Mets game since June, but there’s something nostalgic about wearing the hat of your first love—even when they’re 12 games under .500.
And if they can’t make me happy on the field, they can at least bail me out when my hair is camera-shy.
-SP
There Isn’t anything easy about dressing like a king you dropped this 👑